I found some books in a box on the side of the road, outside a hospice shop.
Many of the books were famous ones I wanted to read.
I decided to take ten of them home with me.
I trotted off down the road loaded like a pack mule feeling rather guilty.
Once I rounded the corner anxiety turned to racing thoughts.
Was I stealing? Was it wrong to take something on the side of the road? I hadn't paid for them? I decided fifty or so metres down the road I would simple dip into a few and then return them outside the store the next day or so.
Something inside me remained unconvinced.
Certain philosophical thoughts also raced through my head: was I acting out the truth? Would this decision haunt me for life? I recalled an Aristotlean scholar who said there were certain decisions we made that could have far long-lasting effects on our lives than we cared to realize! Was I setting myself up for future problems? Was the present me trying to benefit the future me? but really undercutting his ethical and moral standing for the smallest of financial benefits? Did those with little money steal more? Was I to blame for my sullen deed? What did my shadow think about the matter?
I consulted the darker aspects of my psyche! It was rather happy to steal the books.
I paused multiple times while walking down the hill to my house.
The idea of having the books in my room sickened me.
In fact, visual images of mud started to appear in my mind's eye.
Yes, a sense of uncleanliness had overcome me.
This simply wouldn't do, and yet I wanted the books, but did I?
I had to look through them all again, my little horde of jewels!
The one book I wanted the most was one I already had!
I know that sounds rather mad, but the one in my hands, or on top of the pile was a much nicer edition — the cover and font were better.
I thought long and hard then walked on — toward home.
I paused again.
My stealing my moment of weakness had it been driven by my unconscious? I felt it wanted me to remain ladened by guilt!
I let it go.
I returned and walked back, the way I had come. A lightness overcame me.
An ocean of cortisol inside me began to dissipate.
I was simply going for a walk again.
When I placed the books back near the box I noticed a cover had been placed over the books. Some unsuspecting soul had also been tested.
I placed the books back where I had gotten them.
Next to the box, not in it. I couldn't touch the box anymore. Too painful.
I placed the pile down and walked away.
My breathing steadied.
I had been tested, at first, I failed, but then I succeeded. (As the cheesy saying goes).
I overcame my unconscious through the strength of conscious perserverance.
What a bloody relief!
The truth had been lost and then recovered — and all in the span of about 20 minutes.
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I pet a fat cat on my walk around the world of my inner city suburb.
I spontaneously made cups of tea for loved ones to reduce their suffering.
I walked down a muddy track in a state of zen.
I saw my two friends and clasped their hands and love welled up inside me.
I ate a salad that the waitress forgot to bring to our table. I walked after her and took it from the hands of another. The original waitress apologized for her mistake. I said no, it was my mistake, not yours.
I walked slowly up and down a hill holding hands and carrying the children of our family.
Many thoughts appeared in my mind and I noticed them and laughed at many of them. I was the traffic controller letting them flow through my minds eye. Negative thoughts entered, and I sat with them, I breathed deeply, I consciously experienced the discomfort in my body, then I reentered the present and seeped through the field of negativity like water.
I studied and turned over new thoughts and concepts in my mind, glueing them together for fun like a knobbly makeshift statutes.
I connected with nature through my TV screen.
I did well today.
I listened and learnt from monks.
I grew spiritually by swimming in the great cosmic soup of uncertainty.
I abandoned conventional cognition for oriental intuition.
I have been thinking along the same lines. David Goggins is an articulate man; however, he has struggled academically and on standardized tests. He talks about his problems with reading and stuttering earlier in life. These are a dead giveaway he is dyslexic. Both correlate together. When Goggins refers to himself as having a learning disability — he is likely referring to dyslexia. Scientific evidence from a study in 2019 supports my position:
"Mahmoud Elsherif, a PhD psychology student from the University of Birmingham. Mahmoud was looking for people to take part in his study into the reading processes of people with dyslexia and people who stammer.
'We tested 84 people without a diagnosis of dyslexia and stammering, 50 people with dyslexia and 30 people who stammer. We measured behaviour that assessed things such as number recall and repeating non-words.'
'We found that both groups did not differ in any phonological measure. In addition, 34% of people with dyslexia had stammered during childhood and 50% people who stammer fit the dyslexia profile. In short, dyslexia and stammering are more similar than once presumed and both conditions share a phonological difficulty."
Goggins is clever and dyslexic — this commonly crops up as a high functioning dyslexic. Goggins knits together insights fast when talking to other persons it shows he is intelligent and creative, aspects that also lean towards dyslexia. People with dyslexia synthesize knowledge in very creative and non-neurotypical ways than others. Leonardo Da Vinci, for instance. Notice how his journals were full of drawings, and how the greatest marvel he left us the way a painting, classic dyslexia, boosted visual intelligence.
People with learning disabilities struggle on standardized tests. Often, they are allowed more time — although, I'm not sure Goggin's would allow himself to receive extra time, laughs.
https://tinyurl.com/y4l48vxk - Read through this article on how dyslexics need extra prep and planning to pass standardized tests, just like Goggin's needed.
Some helpful diagrams show the weaknesses and strengths associated with Goggin's intelligence if he is dyslexic. Be aware there are common stereotypes around dyslexia that it is a reading disorder, but it's not. Their brains are wired differently (including my own), this makes them see the world differently. Dyslexics excel in none academic areas.
Richard Branson is dyslexia and an impressive businessman, but he has pronounced dyslexia. He too would struggle to pass standardized tests; however, this does not mean he lacks in intelligence.
An interesting new perspective has arisen about intelligence. Different ethnicities have evolved in different environments, and over time, this has meant intelligence has adapted and been passed down through generations with broad variation between peoples.
Relevant paper on Adaptive theory of intelligence. It's enough to read the abstract to see where I am coming from:
It's clear to everyone Goggin's is part African. I believe the latest intelligence research is pointing towards the fact that African intelligence is predominately visual, which makes sense. Lacking in this department would mean an African warrior (Goggin's forebearers) struggling to throw spears and avoid getting gobbled up by lions. Thus, it's possible, Goggins, inherited genes that weighted his intelligence to the visual side of his overall brain functioning. And the more pronounced the weighting towards the visual aspects in Goggin's brain. The deeper the changes in the brain structure the deeper the prioritization of skills and functions, such as; verbal intelligence, spatial intelligence, visual memory — over linguistic intelligence and memory associated with such an area. In the modern world, a highly intelligent man like Goggins can be seen as lower in intelligence, not because he lacks intelligence, but because his form of intelligence is different.
It made me sad when I heard Goggin's says — he was never blessed with intelligence — of course, he was. All you have to do is look at Goggin's head and it becomes immediately apparent he is intelligent. Skull size correlates to brain size which equates with intelligence. The man has a boulder of a head for crying out loud.
Many would say Goggin's is street smart, but that's doing him an injustice. He is smart and intelligent it's just a special type that is predominately visual, which brings new and different insights into the world.
Goggin's idea of the cookie jar is visual.
He constantly tells us to visualize.
He is a visually intelligent man.
Goggins quote:
"Visualize this....Close your eyes before you walk to the ring of life. Think about this as your eyes are closed.
To exist in this world, we must contend with humiliation, broken dreams, sadness, & pain! No motherfucker can avoid it! We are programmed to seek comfort as a way to numb it all out and cushion the blow! The weak-minded are looking for safe spaces to hide.
OH, but there are a few of us that seek out misery, pain, and discomfort! You are that person! You must be the person that prays for the worst situation possible because, you know if it goes that way, you will win!!
Suffering is not for the weak! It’s for the motherfucker looking for the beginning of his/her soul! You want to see where most people’s desire and will ends and yours begins!
When pain comes to you and it will, make sure you are that person who smiles knowing that THIS IS HOME. Now open your eyes and crush all that comes before you! You and only you know the pain you are willing to endure to achieve what others think is the impossible! Stay savage!"
- David Goggins
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Nietzsche believed aristocracies improved humanity. He offers two conventional reasons for why? Both are social innovations. The first is the establishment of a long gradation of humans into different ranks of greater and lesser worth. The second is the grouping of the weighed and valued individuals of similar worth, into distinct and separate social classes. Nietzsche was adamant human beings were not of equal worth, so the fact that aristocracy functioned on such a premise was a welcome and progressive boon. The German philosopher perceived a tiny cluster of humans of having immense value. These scant individuals formed the highest and smallest social class — the aristocracy. The immense hordes of persons contained within the lower classes were of little value. To be frank, Nietzsche was a man who was not opposed to slavery, but who was instead dangerously ambivalent, seeing slaves as valuable not in themselves, but only in how they could be effectively utilized as tools, to help the aristocracy rule, innovate and push humanity forward. The great virtue of the aristocratic ordering of society was that it identified who had value, and who didn't — and then separated them, accordingly. The class that greatly benefitted from this crass social apartheid were the aristocrats. Who experienced, for the first time in history, a great distance between themselves and the masses they governed, looked down upon, and punished into submission. Over time, Nietzsche argues, the new position of privilege of the aristocracy translated into the accelerated development of human beings, who developed different psychological structures that propelled humanity forward, enabling the aristocracy to pull away from animalistic instincts associated with humans of the lower classes and overcome supposedly fixed limitations of what it meant to be human. In other words, without aristocracies, the innovation of the human species would have suffered.
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My friends and I went on a road trip a few years back in a campervan. It was the height of Summer. There were four of us. We drove around the lake on our way to Mt Ruapehu.
My friend Boomin from Sri-Lanka had never seen the snow before, so we decided to make one of his dreams come true. We travelled a great stretch, to do so. I think we were in Rotorua, or parked up in some far-flung area of North Island, before setting out. After hours slowly crawling past, we reached our destination — there was almost no snow.
Undeterred, we lugged our weary bodies up the mountain in the baking sun. I wore a funny-looking cowboy hat.
Finally, we fell across a small patch of half-melted brown snow — acting like children with a wild sense of abandon — we chucked it at each other, laughing, and cackling with joy; our laughter might've caused an avalanche in Winter.
We decided right then and there the expedition was a raging success. To celebrate, we ended up BBQing in the Ruapehu car park; miles above sea-level.
We ate sausages and noodles to satiate our hunger. Drank ice-cool drinks to ease our thirst.
All while being seated precariously on foldable beach chairs. The chairs must've been dazed by their surroundings — if not for their lack of consciousness.
The mountains loomed large, dwarfing us like insects.
Our road trip became a humble and happy memory.
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You may find that people would prefer you remain quiet, prefer that you didn't 'rock the boat', didn't speak your mind! Don't listen. It's your universe given right to speak your mind and stand up for your beliefs - and push your innovative ideas out into the world. The world needs more people who speak up, who say and mean what they think, who don't filter their thoughts from others. It's called honesty. The brave and the honest innovate, they are the ones who change individual and collective lives by remaining true to themselves and looking at problems (and reality) square in the face. Countless people get fixated on problems, terrified by fear and constantly double guess themselves, don't be that type of person. Be hard as nails. Be brave enough to acknowledge the possibility of a solution. This is the defining factor which elevated our species. One brave soul thought, 'Hey, we can't stay in these trees forever...let's go live on the plains, and wrestle with lions'. This simply, stupidly brilliant, idea paid off. Big time. It's the reason you're sipping a coffee, and not picking fleas of your neighbours back.
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I saw her studying at her desk through the window. Her blonde hair stood out. A wave of emotion flowed through me — washing away my melancholy. I didn't have a say in how I felt, I just let the feelings flow. I wasn't too sure how she felt about me, I wasn't worried either. Was it the woman, this woman, who triggered something deep within me, or was it something deeper? I don't know, I accepted my blissful state of ignorance. I saw her walk outside to refresh her mind. My mind was starting to rev up. Then something changed. A tremendous thumping reverberated in my chest. I wanted to talk to her; so I walked outside. Bravely, I walked through the glass doors. She sat alone with her phone and vape. I turned and said: 'Hello, hey, do you remember me?'. 'Yes, I do,' she said. 'Well, I'm the one who gave you that note,' I stated with surprising confidence. She remembered, half-laughing, with a smile dancing upon her countenance. 'That note made my day,' she said. I inwardly smiled. Her face looked different up close. She became more beautiful the closer you were allowed to her. She had gumption and wit. We talked about a range of things: psychology, music, tinnitus. Then I walked away thinking — that's how beautiful things manifest in the world. Through acts that treat someone as an end and themselves, not a means. A person doesn't exist to satisfy a whim. They are a small and irreplaceable chunk of the universe. And yet, neither of us was perfect. But, at that very moment, nestled in space and time, a semblance of perfection arose. A synergy. I held tight to it, as tight as one ever could, but then I let go, and with a deep breath, I returned to the realm of the living. That's what women do to men. They transport them back into the lost rooms of an inner realm. A place most fear to tread.
Moss
41)
When a superior man hears of the Tao — he immediately begins to embody it.
When an average man hears of the Tao — he half believes it and half doubts it.
When a foolish man hears of the Tao — he laughs out loud. If he didn't laugh, it wouldn't be the Tao.
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